Twin Peaks Usenet Archive

Subject: Twin Peaks! The Rip-Off 900 Number
From: (Dan Parmenter)
Date: 1990-10-09, 18:56

Call 900-860-0911 for a rehash of each week's espisode, featuring Lucy, Andy
and Dr. Hayward.  The money goes to charity, so it's not exactly a rip-off, 
but according to the only person I know who has called it, it doesn't
offer any particular insights.  It might be good for a laugh, but at 2
dollars for the first minute and 1 dollar for each additional minute, it
better be really good.  Maybe if I get desperate for a TP "fix"...

The merchandising of this show, as detailed in earlier posts, is
pretty quirky.  No straight novelization, but a fictional "diary".
A tape of Cooper's observations.  What's next, tapes of "My Confessions 
to Dr. Jacobi"?   How about a daily newspaper, like Nat'l Lampoon's
newspaper parody?  I can just picture the comics page - "The Far Side",
"The Angriest Dog in the World", "Zippy", "Krazy Kat" An advice column
called "Ask Dr. Jacobi".  Great headlines like "Dead Prom Queen Found
Wrapped in Plastic".

- Dan

"Elvis was seated on the toilet, actually reading a religious book...when 
suddenly a terrible pain gripped him by his stomach and seized his heart with a
strangler's grip.  'Oh no, dear dear God,' he thought.  He couldn't move.  He 
couldn't get up.  He had to get up.  He must get up...That terrible pain, like 
swords of fire, jabbing, slitting, cutting into his stomach, and especially his
liver - it was impossible to bear...Suddenly the thought flashed through him: 
this must be like what Jesus suffered."