Twin Peaks Usenet Archive

Subject: Re: The Log Lady
From: (Jim Stafford)
Date: 1991-04-05, 22:52

In article <> (Brian D. Moore) writes:
-In article <>, (William K Glunt) writes:
-|> In article <> (timothy meade) writes:
-|> >
-|> >>From: (Richard Travsky)
-|> >>
-|> >>A question about the Log Lady - Is she natural or base 10?
-|> >
-|> >My guess is that she's base tree...
-|> >
-|>  Or Oaktal.
-     Fir God's sake, stop trying to spruce up the net with these jokes.  I
-pine for an air of seriousness here -- what we need is a strict disciplinarian
-at the elm to punish you offenders. (I'm sure if he were alive, Eric the Redwood
-do it. Or maybe Roy Cone.)  I guess we can no longer depend on the kindness of 
-strangers, like Branch DuBois did.  How about this:  the next person to make a tree pun willow the net an apology.  If you don't, we'll kick your ash, or
-maybe just Lynch ya, like we were in the John Birch Society.  We'll leaf your
-nude body swinging in the wind, like a Maplethorpe photograph, your pitiful
-existence trunkated, squashed like a couple of mesquitos.  And I assure you,
-Bush would pardon us.  You should be ashamed, the pear of you.
-     (Forgive me. When I get in front of a terminal, I don't know what happens.
-Just remember, my bark is worse than my byte.)

I've been pinin' fir a chance to say this.  Yew might say it woodn't make one
very poplar to palm off this old saw to the net, that I'm going out on a limb,
but I'm rather frond of it:

	Why is Christmas the same as Halloween?
	Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec.

Maple you like it, maple you don't.  If knot, yew can suck my woodpecker and 
lick my gumbolimbo.  Just hope you don't get Dutch Elm Disease.

...and the Lady's Log must be base 2; it was part of a tree, wasn't it?

jimbo (still at larch!)